There is nothing more wholesome than coming home to a house full of people you love after a long day of fasting. It’s everything from the excitement of worshipping, learning together, breaking bread, and enjoying one another’s company that makes spending Ramadan with family and friends a cherished time.
This year marks my fourth year fasting Ramadan in China, and if I’ve learned anything, it’s that it doesn’t get easier doing it alone. What does get easier is my appreciation for Islam and its teachings that allow me to feel whole knowing I can find sacred spaces and souls wherever I go.
Since moving to Chengdu from Hohhot, I recognize how privileged I was to live in the Muslim district and have greater access to the things I needed. It’s not the same in Chengdu, and though I’m still close enough to the mosque for it to be accessible, I know how much living in Hohhot spoiled me in all the good ways. My bedroom directly faced the mosque and I would hear the athan echoing across the market – does it get better than that?
Change can be a hard pill to swallow, even when it’s the change you asked for. Regardless, I’ve learned enough about living in a different country and managing alone to know that, life is what you make it. Ramadan is what you make it.
To my global Muslim family fasting Ramadan abroad and alone, here are some helpful ways to manage and continue to thrive this month. May you make this month yours in every way possible.
Stay connected
If I’ve learned anything from my first Ramadan living abroad, it’s to stay connected to the mosque. No different than what I said in my previous post on my must-haves living abroad, the same applies here. Going to Taraweeh (night prayer) and witnessing a whole community come together during this blessed month is one of the most healing experiences. Being among other practicing Muslims who are also on the same journey reminds you that you are never in it alone.
Ramadan is equally about building community as it is about developing greater spiritual consciousness.
Unfortunately, if mosques are closed due to Covid restrictions, I highly recommend finding other ways to stay connected to the community. This could be finding community members and friends who are willing to gather elsewhere to worship together.
Have iftar at the mosque
Even if that means bringing your own meals to the mosque. I personally have a harder time getting the nutrients I need when I’m not eating at home, so for the sake of helping myself and also being among other fasting Muslims, I try to bring my own food and some to share. And the best part about breaking your fast at the mosque is, that you’ll be in time for Taraweeh.
If your schedule doesn’t frequently allow it, try setting time during the weekend to enjoy iftar at the mosque. Similarly mentioned above, if mosques are closed, find alternative ways to break fast with the community.
Invite friends for a potluck
Whether you enjoy hosting or not, this is a great way to not feel pressured into preparing a whole meal if you don’t feel you have the capacity or energy to. Ramadan potlucks among friends make breaking your fast enjoyable and from experience, it’s an overall good time.
If not a potluck, maybe going out to a restaurant for iftar will motivate the spirit of Ramadan and being with friends.
Where there is a will, there is always a way. It just takes the right intentions and effort, and the rest will slowly follow.
Get crafty with meal prepping
I am indeed that person who scrolls through Pinterest and looks for cooking shows for recipe inspiration during Ramadan. I will admit this month is the only month I will happily slave away in the kitchen. If I’ve learned anything about meal prepping and fasting alone, it’s making sure you enjoy taking care of yourself and your body.
For some creative recipe ideas, check out my pins on Pinterest to inspire your palate!
Tips on effective meal prepping:
- Budget and plan for your groceries during any free-time
- Buy or pre-cut your ingredients
- Prepare bags of frozen ingredients (especially when planning to make soups, smoothies, etc.)
- Focus on creating sustainable meals (food that will remineralize your body, keep you energized longer, etc.)
Plan your days consciously
Pause. Breathe. And stop trying to overload your workload. It will not serve you, or your ability to thrive long-term. I say this to myself first and foremost. I’m still learning this, and it’s most likely the hardest thing to unlearn: the idea that if we’re not constantly doing or juggling, we’re not doing enough.
Take a large step back, and realize even a little of something good is better than doing too much and feeling burnt out. Ramadan is meant to balance us, and everything that defines our lives. We must learn to declutter our minds in order to make room and compartmentalize everything we give our time to.
Plan, but do it consciously.
How I plan to “plan consciously”:
- Limit my workload after work (try to only focus on one to two tasks in the evening).
- Maximize any downtime for worship, rest, and reflection.
- Get a good night’s sleep.
Get into holistic health
I’m talking mind, body, & soul. Ramadan is the best time to nurture your inner and outer self. This month naturally instills an instinct to be hyper-aware of ourselves, so why not extend it to every aspect of our life. This means, focusing on how and what we consume, our well-being in terms of how centered we are with our self, the way we spend our time, how connected are we to the environment around us, and so forth. Remember, although the idea of holistic health has greatly become popular these days, as Muslims, it’s long been in our DNA. Tap into your deeper roots, and you’ll find everything you need.
I emphasize this to women especially, considering how much our bodies go through on a monthly basis and the society we live in. I, myself have been on a journey of healing and finding a greater balance in my physical body, and it’s been one of the most transformative experiences yet. Keep reading and I’ve listed some courses, particularly for women to help align ourselves with our body and spirit in the next section.
Find educational courses
Staying in the know and keeping up with religious and secular knowledge requires a little more of a push when you’re not surrounded by it or around the right people who would typically appoint you to it. You’re kind of on your own when it comes to developing as a person when living abroad and alone. But of course, that doesn’t make it any less of an obligation. It just takes a little more effort and commitment when you have to become your own biggest motivator.
Here are some resources to nourish your mind, body, & soul:
- Deeper Feminine – FOR WOMEN – a beautiful course created for women to develop a deeper connection with their body
- Seasons Within by Iffet Rafeeq – FOR WOMEN – a course on understanding and mastering your menstrual cycle for the spiritual woman
- The Village Auntie – FOR WOMEN – a Ramadan Intensive designed to explore self-care, community, and spirituality
- Zaytuna College (Ramadan Series)
- Yaqeen Institute
- Qalam Institute
- Seekers Guidance
At the end of the day, there’s nothing more healing and transformative than learning sacred knowledge.
Take the time to really dig deeper into yourself
I would be lying if I said balancing life abroad and alone, work, my spirituality, and everything life brings are easy. I’ve come to realize, I’m literally a queen at keeping it all together for the most part, and it’s tiring, to say the least. We all deserve to pour into ourselves more than we must give because if we remain half-full we will never understand how much potential and power we have when we could otherwise be completely full. This is the purpose of Ramadan, and every year we are given this reminder as a way of mercy.
Lean into yourself, your Creator, and everything you know will give you the power to thrive. You deserve that much and so does the Creator who gave you life.
Here’s how I intend to lean into myself this Ramadan, and beyond:
- Reading more Quran and making it consistent (even if it’s just a page a day)
- Not rushing my duas (supplications) after prayer
- Making more time to reflect and document my thoughts
- Listening to my spiritual instincts
- Creating Islamic calligraphy
Bismillah.
What has helped you manage Ramadan abroad and alone?
